Wandering Child
by Rose Greenwood
Summary: After a particularly distressing episode in her life a young woman comes in contact with the infamous Opera Ghost.
1. Chapter 1

Wandering Child

I sat on the curb in an alley-way behind the old Opera Populaire, crying into an already-soaked handkerchief. I couldn't believe I was alone again, I had so wanted for this to last, and now I was alone and lost again.  
"Why? Why does this always seem to happen?" I whispered to the empty air, at least, I thought it was empty. I sighed, "You will always and forever be my belle." I was speaking to her, as if she could possibly hear me when I had been sure to get as far away as possible, to hide my utter grief.  
Suddenly I heard footsteps in the alley and curled up into an even tighter ball. I just wanted to be left alone. Then I heard a soft and melodious voice singing to me, it quieted my tears enough that I could finally breathe again.  
_"Wandering child, __  
__So lost, so helpless__  
__Yearning for my guidance"__  
_I replied faintly, my voice still rough from crying.  
_"Angel or devil?__  
__Guide or demon?__  
__Who is it there, staring?"__  
_The mysterious voice replied. "_Child you have found your Angel."__  
__"Angel, oh, speak__  
__What endless longings__  
__Echo in this whisper!"__  
__"Too long you've wandered in winter__  
__Far from my far-reaching gaze..."__  
__"Softly my mind yields to you..."__  
__"Don't resist..."__  
_We both sang simultaneously. "_And your/the soul obeys..."__  
__"Angel of Music, __  
__Don't deny me! /Guide and guardian, __  
__Open to true beauty! /Grant to me your glory!__  
__Angel of Music!__  
__Do not shun me/My protector!__  
__Come to your/me strange Angel..."__  
_The mysterious voice changed tone now, and I felt myself rising from my fetal position and into strong arms, I had no fear of this voice, I knew it would not hurt me. "_I am your Angel of Music...__  
__Come to me; Angel of Music..."__  
_When I was standing with my face buried in a thick  
cloak I heard the owner of the voice whisper, "Do not worry child, you need no longer be alone."  
"Thank you, who ever you are, thank you."  
"My name is Erik. Trust me and I will keep you safe."  
"Alright. You have my trust." I felt a gloved hand take mine as Erik led me from the alley, my tears still flowing, but not as heavily. "Where are we going?"  
"My home." He pulled me so that I was walking beside him. I closed my eyes, hiding the fact that they were blood-shot and weak from crying and ducking my head to hide my blotchy cheeks. "Child, where we are going you need not hide. There is no one there who will judge you by your appearance."  
I became aware that we were remaining in shadows, an easy feat considering the fact that the sun was setting. I was also aware that we were on a down slope. "Erik, where is your home?" I looked up and saw his face for the first time, half of it was covered by a white mask.  
"Below the Opera. I think you will like it, at least, I hope you will." We stopped momentarily and a door opened up in the wall in front of us. We continued on at a downward angle, it was getting continuously colder. We stopped at the edge of a lake and Erik helped me into the boat that was moored in front of us. After I was situated he climbed in behind and pushed the boat away from the mooring point.  
The farther out on the lake we got the colder it got, soon I was shivering profusely. Erik stopped the boat, undid his cloak and draped it over me without tipping the boat. "I apologize for the temperature, but there isn't much one can do when one is below ground."  
I shook my head. "It's fine; really, I just have to get used to it, that's all." I smiled back at him. "Thanks for the cloak."  
He smiled back, "You're quite welcome Mam'selle..." At that moment we both realized that I had never told him my name.  
"Zoe. My last name really isn't that important. I no longer associate myself with one whom the name comes from."  
"Zoe. It's a beautiful name."  
I blushed, "No, not really, I don't like it that much. Too short, too unusual." I shrugged; the truth was I was uncomfortable with him saying how beautiful it was; the last person who had told me that had just recently broken my heart.  
"I have made you uncomfortable, forgive me. It was not my intention."  
"How...? Never mind, forgiven." I ducked my head again, to hide the threatening tears.  
"Zoe, look up." I did so, just in time to see a portcullis rising out of the water and curtains pulling back, revealing that rose from the water and lit when they made contact with the air. On a far wall there was a beautiful organ, also surrounded by candles.  
"It's beautiful." I smiled, my first smile since that morning. The boat docked and Erik helped me out of it, wrapping his cloak around me after I was on solid ground.  
"You need it more than me." He responded to my look rather than anything I had said. Something she had done often. I bit my lip and went to sit on a flight of stairs. Erik followed me, "Forgive me, I seem to be determined to upset you."  
"No, its not you, really. It's just, I only recently lost the person I loved and there are some things you do that remind me too much of them." I wasn't about to tell him, even though I felt a connection, that the one whom I had lost was a woman. I didn't want him to see me as unnatural, the way my father had. "May I have some time alone? Please?"  
"Yes, of course." He helped me to my feet and led me to a room just off to the side. It was furnished beautifully in dark reds and browns. "My room is just up the stairs if you need anything. I am also quite frequently at the organ." He bowed. "I am entirely at your disposal."  
"Thank you." I nodded and went to sit on the bed. After some time I was struck with the urge to sing, as I had so often when I was young.  
_"Green finch and linnet bird, nightingale, blackbird,__  
__How is it you sing?__  
__How can you jubilate sitting in cages__  
__never taking wing?__  
__Outside the sky waits, beckoning! Beckoning!__  
__Just beyond the bars...__  
__How can you remain staring at the rain__  
__maddened by the stars?__  
__How is it you sing, anything?__  
__How is it you sing?__  
__My cage has many rooms, damask and dark...__  
__Nothing there sings, not even my lark.__  
__Larks never will, you know, when they're captive.__  
__Teach me to be more adaptive.__  
__Ah...__  
__Green finch and linnet bird, nightingale, blackbird,__  
__teach me how to sing.__  
__If I cannot fly...__  
__Let me sing."_ As I finished the song tears streamed down my face, soaking my dress.

I heard footsteps and turned away from the door to hide my tears. "Child," There was something wonderfully soothing in Erik's voice, "You sing beautifully. I could arrange for you to have a career at the Opera."  
"No. Too public. I can't sing in public to save my life."  
"Perhaps you could in time. With my help. I have some knowledge in teaching others to sing. Would you like to better yourself?"  
I nodded, "Okay. I...I need something to get my mind off of the pain."  
"Then I am just the one to help."


	2. Chapter 2

I woke up to soft music playing, a song I had known for some time. I started singing softly along.  
"Masquerade!  
Paper faces on parade . . .  
Masquerade!  
Hide your face,  
so the world will  
never find you!" I sat up in bed and pushed aside the lace curtain, looking for the source of the music.  
I walked down the stairs to the pipe organ and saw Erik sitting there, playing. I smiled faintly, not much, but enough to be called a smile. "Good morning." My voice was raw from crying yesterday, but loud enough to be heard.  
Erik turned and smiled, well, what I could see of his face smiled. "Good morning mon ange."  
I blushed, faintly, nothing brought a very large reaction from me lately. "I'm no angel Erik."  
"Ah, but I can guarantee you're more of an angel than I am." He rose and crossed to me, extending his hand. "Would you like to sit?" He indicated a soft chair a short way away from the organ.  
I took his hand. "Alright, sure." He sat me down and took the chair opposite. We sat in silence for some time, neither of us wanting to break it.  
After a while I spoke. "What did you mean earlier Erik? About me being more of an angel?"  
He sighed. "I have done things in my past mon ange, things that I am not proud of. I...I hurt the woman I loved. I have killed people before. And so I am alone, doomed to solitude for all my life."  
"For something you did?"  
"No..." He paused, clearly hesitant to speak of it. "For how I look."  
"What do you mean?"  
He smiled dryly. "You do not think I wear this mask for a fashion statement do you?"  
I immediately saw my error, I had touched his sore spot. "Forgive me...I...I did not mean...to...to offend you in any way." I looked down, I couldn't do anything right. Dammit.  
I heard him stand and kneel next to me. "Forgiven mon ange. All I ask is that you not remove my mask without my permission."  
"Yes, of course, just...just please don't throw me out."  
"I would never do that." His voice sounded hurt. "You are safe here with me." He wrapped his arms around my shoulders.  
I leaned into him and let myself cry. I cried for my own stupidity, for his loss, his pain, and my own loss.  
When my sobs were reduced to hiccups he tilted my head up. "Are you alright now?"  
I nodded, "I'm hungry."  
He smiled and left, coming back with some eggs and toast. "It's not much."  
"I don't eat much any way, it's alright." I ate slowly, eating the toast and picking at the eggs till they were gone. I looked up at him, he was smiling.  
"Shall I play you something?"  
I shrugged, what did it matter really?  
He sat down at the organ. "I find that music helps the pain." He began to play something I didn't recognize, but it did make me feel better, I began to nod off in the chair. I heard the music stop briefly before he covered me with his cloak again.  
The music changed to a slow song, almost a lullaby as I fell asleep, exhausted by tears and pain.

I woke up and groaned, I had a huge crick in my neck. Before I opened my eyes I knew I had fallen asleep in a chair again, and I knew that I was still there. I sighed to myself, thinking that any moment she would walk in and laugh at me for doing this yet again.  
All this before I opened my eyes. Then, well, then I opened them, and everything came rushing back. The pain, the tears, the hiding, and Erik. I set my feet on the floor, bent over, and started crying. I had so hoped that it had been just a dream, a nightmare, but no, it had been real.  
I heard footsteps and buried my face deeper into what I realized was Erik's cloak, again. My shoulders shook with tears, the pain tearing a hole in my chest. I felt Erik's hand on my shoulder.  
"I'm so sorry mon ange. I would take the pain away if I could, you do not deserve it."  
I gasped and coughed through my tears. I looked up at him. "Neither did you."  
He frowned, "I am unnatural mon ange, a monster."  
I smiled wryly. "I too am unnatural, so who are you to say that I do not deserve it?"  
Erik looked at me strangely but did not ask. I was grateful for that. Instead he moved over to the organ.  
"Shall we begin your lessons?" He turned and indicated that I should sit next to him.  
"Uh, sure." I went and sat down on the bench. Before he turned back to the keys he pulled the cloak tighter around me. I looked at him questioningly.  
He smiled slightly. "I do not want you catching cold, it does awful things to your voice."  
I smiled back. "Thank you." He nodded, turned to the keys and started to play. I knew the song, I had heard it a few years ago at the opera, sung by a beautiful young soprano named Christine Daae.  
I cleared my throat softly, and hummed to get in tune. Then I began to sing.  
"_Think of me, think of me fondly, __  
__when we've said goodbye. __  
__Remember me once in a while - please promise me you'll try. __  
__When you find that, once again, you long to take your heart back __  
__and be free - if you ever find a moment spare a thought for me ... __  
__We never said our love was evergreen, __  
__or as unchanging as the sea - but if you can still remember, __  
__stop and think of me ... __  
__Think of all the things we've shared and seen - __  
__don't think about the things which might have been ... __  
__Think of me, think of me waking, silent and resigned. __  
__Imagine me, trying too hard to put you from my mind. __  
__Recall those days, look back on all those times, __  
__think of the things we'll never do - there will never be a day, when __  
__I won't think of you ...__  
__Flowers fade, the fruits of summer fade__  
__They have their seasons so do we- but please promise me, that sometimes, you will think of me!"__  
_I stopped, gasping for breath a bit at the very end, the crescendo always left me breathless. Erik was looking at me strangely and I feared that I had done something wrong.  
"What, what is it?"  
"Your voice...I haven't heard a voice like that since...since Christine." Erik's face clouded with sorrow and I, on impulse, wrapped my arms around him.  
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." I didn't know what I was apologizing for, just that I felt that I needed to for some reason.  
"You are forgiven mon ange." He grasped my arm with one of his hands, which went all the way around the thickest part of my forearm, I've always been bird-boned. "You are most forgiven."

~Erik POV  
I had left the main area of my home earlier, after finishing playing a lullaby for Zoe on the organ. I had wandered up to my room after covering her with my cloak and started looking for a song that I had started to write after Christine left but had stopped when the pain had made it impossible for the music to come.  
It took me longer to find it than I would have liked, there were dozens of half-finished songs scattered across the floor of my room. I put them all in order, together, only then did I find the one I was looking for. I tucked it under my arm and went back to the organ.  
As I exited my room and began to descend the stairs I heard Zoe crying again. I frowned and put the song on the organ. I walked over and lay my hand on her shoulder. "I'm so sorry mon ange. I would take the pain away if I could, you do not deserve it."  
She gasped through her tears." Neither did you."  
I frowned, "I am unnatural mon ange, a monster."  
She looked up and smiled wryly. "I too am unnatural, so who are you to say that I do not deserve it?"  
I looked at her strangely, how could such a lovely young woman be unnatural, but did not ask what she meant, something told me that that was too personal a question just yet. Instead I moved over to the organ.  
"Shall we begin your lessons?" I turned and indicated that she should sit next to me.  
"Uh, sure." She sat down on the bench, my cloak falling off her. _Perhaps I should get her one that fits her better._ I thought and before I turned back to the keys I pulled the cloak tighter around her. I laughed to myself as she looked at me questioningly.  
"I do not want you catching cold, it does awful things to your voice."  
She smiled back, it was very slight, but it was good to see her smile after all those tears. "Thank you."  
I nodded and turned to the keys and began to play _Think of Me_. I don't know why, it was just the first thing that came to my mind, fortunately she knew the song by heart.  
Her voice was beautiful as I had noticed on the first occasion I had heard it. She infused the song with a sadness and suffering that I recognized from my own singing. Her skill was so similar to Christine's that it was almost impossible for me not to cry.  
After the crescendo at the end of the song she gasped a bit for breath and I looked over at her. She must have seen something in my look because she asked me what was wrong.  
"Your voice...I haven't heard a voice like that since...since Christine." I felt my face cloud with sorrow and she wrapped her arms around me.  
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." I didn't know why she was apologizing, only that she seemed to need my forgiveness, which I most certainly could not deny her.  
"You are forgiven mon ange." I grasped her arm with one of my hands, it went almost the whole way around her arm, she was so delicate. "You are most forgiven."

**About this Story**


	3. Chapter 3

The next few weeks Erik and I fell into a routine. Sleep, eat, practice, talk, eat, sleep. I found myself growing more and more comfortable with him, although my curiosity about his mask kept growing. But since it seemed to be a sensitive subject I avoided it. One day though Erik brought up _my _sensitive subject.  
"You said during your first lesson that you are unnatural. What did you mean?" He clearly didn't mean to hurt me, in fact he seemed to want to avoid hurting me.  
I winced slightly, it was time he knew. "Well, I...when I was growing up I always knew I was different. I wasn't interested in what other girls were interested in. Then, when I was about 11 I decided that I loved girls, like other girls loved boys. I told my father, my mother died when I was little. He...exploded, he...hit me, once, then twice and more. Mother would have been fine with it, but he said...he said I was an abomination, a sinful person, unnatural. I left when I was 14 and went to live with my brother, who was 18. I told him and he just smiled and hugged me. Two years later I met Krystal. She was from Britain, she was the same way I was. We...we fell in love. I lived with her for oh, God, over 5 years." Here I stopped, fighting tears, the pain had become less, but this was the first time I had really thought about it since it happened. "Just a few weeks ago, on the day you and I met, she...she left me. She said that she didn't love me anymore, that she loved a man, that she didn't want me around anymore. I ran, far, I couldn't believe it." I started to cry, "Why did she have to leave? Why can't I let her go?"  
Erik leant over me, "Because you have no one else to cling to." He paused, "You can always cling to me, if you want."  
I nodded, "But if I'm going to do that I...I have to know what you really look like."  
He winced, "Why? I'm a monster. All men run from me. My face is why I lost Christine."  
"I'm different. I know what's in your heart, that's what matters to me. I just...I have to know or my curiosity is only going to get worse."  
He sighed, "Alright. If...if you have to."  
I lay my hand on the left side of his face and ran the other down the smooth mask. "I'm taking it off now." I thought it was fair to let him know.  
"Alright." His voice was strained with an emotion I couldn't place.  
I removed the mask and he winced. I looked at him, he _was_ deformed, but it didn't scare me. He had been so kind to me, I knew that it didn't matter. I kissed the deformed side of his face gently and replaced his mask. "It's not so bad."  
He looked at me, his eyes searching mine for the truth, he found it. A tear slid down his face as he took my hand in his. "You aren't afraid?"  
"Nope. The face doesn't make the man mon cher." I don't know why I called him that, it just slipped out.  
He didn't mention it. "Thank you mon ange, thank you so much." He kissed my knuckles and wept softly.  
I wrapped my arms around him. "I guess we'll both just have to be each other's strength huh? Each other's rock." I smiled, "Neither of us is in very good shape."  
He nodded and returned my embrace. "We'll both get better, with each other's help."  
"With each other's help. I like that."  
"I'm glad."


	4. Chapter 4

~Erik POV  
The day after Zoe had seen my face I half expected her to look away every time she saw me, but she didn't. She would smile at me every morning when she came to breakfast and when we started her lessons. She was improving greatly, and could now sing some of the more advanced pieces that I hadn't even given to Christine.  
Despite what she had told me about her loving women I could feel myself starting to fall for her. I tried not to, I didn't want to be hurt again. But I could feel that this was different, this was love, not obsession. I could only hope that perhaps she would grow to love me.  
I felt terrible, keeping her down by the lake with me. She should have been out in the world, living her life instead of being trapped in the dark like I was. She never complained but I suspected it was beginning to wear on her. I mentioned it to her one day after her lessons.  
"Zoe?"  
She looked over at me and smiled. "Yes? What is it?" She tilted her head to the side, her short hair falling rather adorably in her face.  
"Do you miss being outside, in the world?"  
She thought about it, as if carefully considering all the facets of the question. "Maybe sometimes, I miss being able to watch the sunrise and sunset, and counting the stars. But the people, well, I can live without people." She smiled at me in such a way that I hoped that she loved me, if only so that I could see her smile like that more. "But your company more than makes up for it. Why do you ask?"  
I sighed. "I feel as if I should let you go, let you live your life. You shouldn't be stuck with me down here, trapped with a monster."  
She sighed. "You are not a monster cher, you've done bad things yes, but that does not make you a monster." She stood from the chair by the organ she always sat in after lessons and stood in front of me, one hand on my right shoulder and one on the left side of my face. "I don't want to ever hear you describe yourself as a monster again, alright?" Her eyes became incredibly soft and kind, something I had never seen when someone was looking at me. "Please? For me? I hate to hear you say that."  
My heart quivered a little, maybe she did love me, I didn't know. I swallowed and nodded. "Alright mon ange, as you wish."  
She smiled. "Thank you." She sat back down, leading me with her. "I was wondering, do you think I'm ready for the Opera?"  
My eyes widened. "Absolutely. You'd depose the current prima Dona in a heartbeat." She smiled.  
"Then I have a solution to our current dilemma."  
"Dilemma?"  
"Whether I should stay here or live my life. I say I go to the Opera, that way I'm close, but can still 'live my life' as you said. Is that agreeable?"  
I nodded. "I'll send a letter to the managers tomorrow." I wanted her with me, just one more night before she remembered the joys of living in the world and forgot me.  
She nodded, "Alright. Thank you Erik." She stood and gently kissed my cheek. "For everything." She squeezed my hand and went to go prepare a lunch for us.  
~Zoe POV  
I loved him, dear god, I had never considered that I could love a man, but he was so kind, so gentle. I stood in his small kitchen fixing us a lunch. Tomorrow I would go perform in the Opera. I suggested that because I thought it would make him happy. I didn't know if I could ever replace Christine or even repair the damage she had done, but I wanted to try.  
I loved to see the faint hint of a smile when I told him that, I wanted to be able to make him smile more. He had done so much for me, he had healed my heart, the heart I thought I had lost. I wanted to do something in return.  
I brought out the lunch, sandwiches, it wasn't much, but we'd probably have a bigger dinner tonight. "You really think I'm ready?"  
He smiled and nodded. "Of course. I can't wait to hear you sing on stage. It will be nice to attend an opera again. I haven't been to once since Christine left." He didn't even hesitate when he said her name any more, the same way I had stopped hesitating. I hoped I was doing the same for him as he was for me. "I will, of course, continue to give you lessons. I shall arrange for you to have a room with a two-way mirror so that I can still visit. Only if you want of course."  
"I'd love it. Maybe Christine's old room?" I stopped as soon as I'd said it, hopping I hadn't gone out of line.  
He nodded. "Yes, that will do nicely." I took a deep breath of relief, he wasn't upset, thank god.  
We ate mostly in silence, afterwards I went to my room to "nap." However, I wound up spending the time before dinner wondering if maybe some day he would love me back.


	5. Chapter 5

~Zoe POV  
I sat at the table while Erik fixed dinner. He'd been so kind to me, letting me stay here and teaching me to sing. I smiled as I thought of the fact that I could finally repay him by singing in the Opera.  
Erik came out of the kitchen a few minutes later, carying a basket. I laughed. "What's this for?"  
Erik smiled. "A picnic. You mentioned missing being able to look at the stars and watch the sunset. I have a surprise for you." He extended his hand, covered by the usual black leather glove, and helped me to my feet. "I would have let you know, but then it wouldn't have been much of a surprise."  
He led me gently through a series of passageways at a decent slope and then up several flights of stairs. I was glad he was there or I would have been lost in a second.  
At the top of one last flight ofspiral stairs he opened a door the led out onto the roof of the opera house, right behind the massive winged horse sculpture that was visible from the ground.  
The sun had just set behind the Paris city-scape and had left the sky a briliant red-orange. Behind the Opera House a few stars had begun to peak out. I gasped at the beauty of it all. "Oh, Erik, it's wonderful." I moved out toward the edge of the roof and looked out at the few people moving along the streets, mostly in expensive carriages, all heading toward the Opera House.  
"I used to come up here to watch people. It was the closest I could get to a normal life. I used to imagine that I was one of them, going home to a wife and child." His voice sounded so sad. I turned and looked at him. He had spread out the picnic on a dark red cloth.  
"It looks wonderful." I smiled and sat across from him. "Thank you for bringing me up here."  
He nodded. "Of course. I thought you would like it."  
"I do, it's wonderful. I love it." _I love you_. I wanted to say it, but I couldn't risk losing him.  
We ate mostly in silence. When I was done I stood up again and leaned against the winged horse sculpture and looked up at the increasingly-evident stars. "It's beautiful, isn't it?"  
"Yes, it really is." He sounded preoccupied so I turned to look at him, expecting to see him looking at the stars as well, but instead to find him looking at me. "It's very fitting really. Beauty and beauty." He looked away. "And beauty rarely even looks at the beast."  
My heart choked. "No!" I threw my arms around him. "No! Stop it! You promised!" I felt like a small child. But I wanted him to be happy. "Please, please, you're not a beast, you're not a monster. You're not. You're kind and gentle and caring and you didn't judge me and a good man and I love you." The last part slipped out. I stepped back, terrified that I had said it. My hands flew to cover my mouth.  
~Erik POV  
"...and I love you." My mind stopped. She loved me? How could she love me? I had thought...but apparently she meant it, even in the dim lighting that reflected up from below I could see her blush when I turned to face her.  
"I...You love me?" I couldn't help it, I was rather stunned. I still could hardly believe it.  
She nodded. "Yes. I...I know I could probably never begin to replace Christine, but...but I do love you. And I won't leave you either. I could never submit someone to that kind of pain. Yes. I love you."  
My heart swelled and I took her gently in my arms. "I love you to mon ange. I do. I had only hoped that you would feel the same, and even then I thought it a fools hope." I didn't need to explain why, she understood.  
She nodded and leaned her head on my shoulder. "Do you still think I should live in the Opera House? Couldn't I just stay with you?"  
I sighed and held her closer. "As much as I would like that dear, I think it would be best if we don't draw that kind of attention to you. I will come and see you every performance and afterwards in your room, but it will be bad enough with me sending a letter to the managers about you. I don't want you to get hurt."  
She nodded. "I understand. Thank you. Can I come down to see you when I have time off, for weekends and holidays?"  
I smiled and kissed the top of her head, this felt so right. "Yes, but I will request that you wait for me to come and get you. The passageways are many and dangerous. I don't want you getting lost or hurt. Alright?"  
She nodded. "Alright. I promise."  
I had never imagined such bliss when I heard the happiness in her voice. "I love you Zoe."  
"I love you too Erik."


End file.
